Roshan D'Mello: Hey Mukesh, there is a bug in your code. Type a text in user name text box and press enter. Beep sound doesn't appear.
Mukesh Thakur: How can that be a bug? There is no requirement that beep sound should come. Anyway, I will assign it to offshore and get it fixed.
After 2 days,
Mukesh Thakur: Roshan, bug is fixed. Please verify.
After another 2 days,
Roshan D'Mello: I have re-opened the bug because sound is not coming in some PCs. Sound is coming in my machine, but my colleague Rajat Choudhry is not getting the sound.
After another 2 days,
Mukesh Thakur: Not a bug. I observed that your friend Rajat Choudhry has old IBM machine. Unlike your DELL machine, IBM machines do not have inbuilt speakers. So, to hear the sound in Rajat Choudhry's machine, please use head phones and then get the bug closed soon.
Another 2 days,
Roshan D'Mello: I have re-opened the bug because sound tone is different across different machines. Sound is coming as 'BEEP' in my machine, but my colleague Rajat Choudhry who is having IBM machine is getting the sound as 'TONG'.
Mukesh Thakur: Not a bug. Get lost man. What can we do for the bug? The two machines are built in such a way that they produce different sounds. Do you expect the developers to rebuild the IBM processors to make them uniform? Please close it.
Another 2 days,
Roshan D'Mello: I have re-opened the bug because intensity of beep sound produced on 2 different DELL machines is different. My machine produces beep sound of intensity 10 decibels whereas my friend's machine produces sound worth 20 decibels. Fix your code to make the sound uniform across all machines.
Another 2 days later,
Mukesh Thakur: Once again it is not a bug. I have noticed that the volume set is different on the two machines. Ensure that volume is same in both the machines before I get mad and then close the bug.
Another 2 days,
Roshan D'Mello: I have re-opened the bug.
Mukesh Thakur: What ?? Why? What more stupid reasons can be there for re-opening?
Roshan D'Mello: Sound intensity is different for machines placed at different locations (different buildings). So, I have re-opened it.
After 2 days,
Mukesh Thakur: I have made some scientists do an acoustical analysis of the two buildings you used for testing. They have observed that the acoustics in the two buildings varies to a large extent. That is why sound intensity is different across the 2 buildings. So, I beg you to please close the bugs.
After 1 year
Roshan D'Mello: I am re-opeing the bug. During the year, I requested the clients to arrange architects to build two buildings with same acoustical features, so that I can test it again. Now, when I tested, I found that intensity of sound still varying. So, I am re-opening the defect.
Mukesh Thakur: GROWLLLL.....I am really mad now. I am sure that the sound waves of the two buildings are getting distorted due to some background noice or something. Now I need to waste time to prove that it is because of background noice.
Roshan D'Mello: No need for that. We will put the machines and run them in vacuum and see.
Mukesh Thakur: (not alive)Three Examinations special
1) Special offer........ Bring a chit on exam day, scratch and show it to your nearest teacher and win free trip to Principal's office and enjoy 3 years vacation at home.
Hurry offer valid until exams only....
2) It takes 15 trees to produce the amount of paper that we use to write our exam once (excluding supplementary). Join us in promoting the noble cause of saving trees.
Say NO to EXAMS
3) Student's declaration at the end of answer paper. It Reminds me of Disclaimer Notices!
"I hereby declare that answers written above r true 2 the best of mine & my friend's knowledge & I claim no responsibility whatsoever 4 any mistakes. Whatever I have written is truly fictitious & any resemblance with the Subject Matter is purely Coincidental."
Infosys, Bangalore : An employee applied for leave as follows:
"Since I have to go to my village to sell my land along with my wife, please sanction me one-week leave."
· This is from Oracle Bangalore: >From an employee who was performing the "hair cut" ceremony of his 10 year old son:
"as I want to shave my son's head, please leave me for two days."
· Another gem from CDAC. Leave-letter from an employee who was performing his daughter's wedding:
"as I am marrying my daughter, please grant a week's leave.."
· From H.A.L. Administration Dept:
"As my mother-in-law has expired and I am only one responsible for it, please grant me 10 days leave."
· Another employee applied for half day leave as follows:
"Since I've to go to the cremation ground at 10 o-clock and I may not return, please grant me half day casual leave"
· An incident of a leave letter:
"I am suffering from fever, please declare one-day holiday."
· A leave letter to the headmaster:
"As I am studying in this school I am suffering from headache. I request you to leave me today"
· Another leave letter written to the headmaster:
"As my headache is paining, please grant me leave for the day."
· Covering note:
"I am enclosed herewith..."
· Another one:
"Dear Sir: with reference to the above, please refer to my below..."
· Actual letter written for application of leave:
"My wife is suffering from sickness and as I am her only husband at home I may be granted leave".
· Letter writing:-
"I am well here and hope you are also in the same well."
· A candidate's job application:
"This has reference to your advertisement calling for a ' Typist and an Accountant - Male or Female'... As I am both(!! )for the past several years and I can handle both with good experience, I am applying for the post.
Dear Mr Bill Gates,
This letter is from Banta Singh from Punjab. We have bought a computer
for our home and we found problems, which I want to bring to your
notice.
1. After connecting to internet we planned to open e-mail account and
whenever we fill the form in Hotmail in the password column,
only ****** appears, but in the rest of the fields whatever we typed
appears, but we face this problem only in password field. We checked
with hardware vendor Santa Singh and he said that there is no problem in
keyboard.
Because of this we open the e-mail account with password *****. I
request you to check this as we ourselves do not know what the password
is.
2. We are unable to enter anything after we click the 'shut down '
button.
3. There is a button 'start' but there is no "stop" button. We request
you to check this.
4. We find there is 'Run' in the menu. One of my friend clicked 'run '
has ran upto Amritsar! So, we request you to change that to "sit", so
that we can click that by sitting.
5. One doubt is that any 're-scooter' available in system? As I find
only 're-cycle', but I own a scooter at my home.
6. There is 'Find' button but it is not working properly. My wife lost
the door key and we tried a lot for tracing the key with this ' find',
but unable to trace. Is it a bug??
7. Every night I am not sleeping as i have to protect my 'mouse' from
CAT, So i suggest u to provide one DOG to kill that cat.
8. Please confirm when u are going to give me money for winning 'HEARTS'
(playing cards in games) and when are u coming to my home to collect ur
money.
9. My child learnt 'Microsoft word' now he wants to learn 'Microsoft
sentence', so when u will provide that?
10. And what's this, I brought computer, cpu, mouse and keypad lekhin
there is only one icon with 'MY Computer', what bout the rest?
11. And this thing is limit. Here it says 'MY Pictures' but there is
not even single photo of mine, So when u will keep my photo in that.
with sincere regards
Banta singh
The CUSTOMER... 
The Quality Analyst...
The Software Analyst... 
The Developers... 
The Technical lead...
The PROJECT MANAGER!!!!!! 
1
Interviewer: what is your birth date?
Sardar: 13th October
Which year?
Sardar : Oye ullu ke pathe _ _ _ EVERY YEAR
2
Manager asked to sardar at an interview
Can you spell a word that has more than 100 letters in it?
Sardar replyed: -P-O-S-T-B-O-X.
3
Teacher to Sardar: Write your best friend's name in English.
Sardar wrote: ' Beautiful Red Underware'
Teacher: What?
Sardar: His name is Sundar Lal Chaddi
4
After returning back from a foreign trip, sardar asked his wife,
Do I look like a foreigner?
Wife: No! Why?
Sardar: In London a lady asked me Are you a foreigner?
5
Lecturer: write a note on Gandhi Jayanthi
So Sardar writes, "Gandi was a great man, but I don't know who is Jayanthi.
6
When sarda r was traveling with his wife in an auto, the driver
adjusted mirror. Sardar shouted, "You are trying to see my wife? Sit
back. I will drive.
7
Interviewer: just imagine your in 3rd floor, it caught fire and how
will you escape?
Sardar : its simple. I will stop my imagination!!!
8
A sardar invested 2 Lakhs in a business and Suffered huge Loss. Do u
know what the business was? . . . .. . . . . .. . . He opened a Saloon
in Punjab!
9
Sardar told his servant: Go and water the plants.
Servant: It's already raining. Sardar: So what take an umbrella and go.
10
Postman: - I Have To Come 5 Miles to Deliver U This Packet
Sardar: - Why did u come so far. Instead u could have posted it....
11
Sardar's wish: when i die, i wana die like my grandpa who died
peacefully in his sleep not screaming like all d passengers in d bus he
was driving..
12
Sardar: For the past one week a girl is disturbing me. I don't know how
she got my number, She interrupts whenever I call someone and says
"please recharge your card"
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