Once someone asked me,
'What is the secret behind your happy married life?'
I said, 'You should share responsibilities with due love and respect to each other.
Then there will be absolutely no problems.'
The person asked, 'Can you explain?'
I said, 'In my house, I take decisions on bigger issues where as my
wife decides on smaller issues. We do not interfere in each other's
decisions.' Still not convinced, the person asked me 'Give me some examples'
I said, ' Smaller issues like which car we should buy, how much amount
to save, when to visit home town, which Sofa, air conditioner,
refrigerator to buy, monthly expenses, whether to keep a maid or not etc are
decided by my wife. I just agree to it' The person asked, 'Then what is
your role?' I said, 'My decisions are only for very big issues. Like,
whether Musharraff should stay in the power or not, whether America
should attack Iran, whether Britain should lift sanctions over Zimbabwe,
whether to widen the African economy, whether Shahid Afridi should retire
etc etc.
And, would you believe, my wife NEVER objects to any of my decisions'.

Before Marriage...

He: Yes. At last. It was so hard to wait.
She: Do you want me to leave?
He: NO! Don't even think about it.
She: Do you love me?
He: Of course! Over and over!
She: Have you ever cheated on me?
He: NO! Why are you even asking?
She: Will you kiss me?
He: Every chance I get!
She: Will you hit me?
He: Are you crazy! I'm not that kind of person!
She: Can I trust you?
He: Yes.
She: Darling!


After marriage...

Simply read from bottom to top.

A wife was making a breakfast of fried eggs for her husband. Suddenly her husband burst into the kitchen.

"Careful ... CAREFUL! Put in some more butter! Oh my GOD! You're cooking too many at once. TOO MANY! Turn them! TURN THEM NOW! We need more butter. Oh my GOD! WHERE are we going to get MORE BUTTER? They're going to STICK! Careful ... CAREFUL! I said be CAREFUL! You NEVER listen to me when you're cooking!

Never! Turn them! Hurry up! Are you CRAZY? Have you LOST your mind? Don't forget to salt them. You know you always forget to salt them. Use the salt. USE THE SALT! THE SALT!"

The wife stared at him. "What in the world is wrong with you? You think I don't know how to fry a couple of eggs?"

The husband calmly replied, "I wanted to show you what it feels like when I'm driving."